Jon: One Legged Pants.

Don’t call it a skirt….

So, as many of you already know, my real life “non-blog” job involves me absorbing a lot of detailed information on all types of fashion. A part of this involves doing written reports (seriously) on mall chain store websites. I know, it really glamorous.

Well, I just did a report on Hot Topic. Good old Hot Topic, selling mid-nineties alterna-teen clothes for the last 15 years. Remember these from 1997?

“Two” Legged Pants

Yeah they’ve got those.

How about this little number?:

“One” Legged Pants

Still for sale! While looking at the page for the “man skirt” above, I noticed something odd about the word choice.

“These black one-legged pants feature removable chain straps and D-ring and grommet accents. 66″ leg opening. 100% cotton. Wash cold. Dry flat. Imported.”

Excuse me? Was that ONE LEGGED PANTS?!?!

Look at this kid:

goth kid

Are we truly meant to believe that he is so insecure about his gender identity that he will only buy a skirt if it is referred to as “one legged pants”? Come on!

I also thought the 66″ leg opening part was pretty genius. Do the men who wear these have to have one giant monster appendage instead of legs? As though the description is saying “Big cock? Here is a comfortable pant solutuon!”.

Yeah goth kid, your cock is huge…..


Oh, and though it has nothing to do with goths or Hot Topic, I couldn’t help but think of this
while working on this post


2 Responses to “Jon: One Legged Pants.”

  1. 1 Monica... from K-SLuG
    January 8, 2008 at 11:01 pm

    Okay Jon… you about killed me, just then. One-legged pants. Good lord. Good thing no one thinks Hot Topic is punk rock anymore… or do they?

    down in Humboldt.

  2. January 9, 2008 at 10:59 pm

    Wouldn’t that be “one-legged pant”? And wouldn’t that, then, be redundant?

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