Jon: Ok, I’m getting sick of the trash talk….


…I like the campy Batman better! So shut your trap!

With the release of, Dark Knight, the newest film in the long-standing Batman franchise, there has been a lot of talk and comparisons being made in regards to the 90’s films of the same subject matter. While most are in agreement that the first two films (Batman, Batman Returns) are fantastic, almost everyone with a soapbox to preach from has been talking some serious shit about the third (Batman Forever) and fourth (Batman and Robin) films.

What the fuck? I mean, seriously, I love these films… Not everyone wants a serious, dark, brooding  Batman. I prefer my caped crusader campy and fabulous! Here are just a couple of the countless reasons why faggy Batman kicks prozacy/gothy/straight Batman’s ass:

1.) Cheesy one liners and choreography:

This video was originally created (most likely by a boring nerdy straight guy) to make a case for why Batman and Robin was the worst movie ever. Apparently this guy has never heard of camp. Just look at those crotch/ass shots and ridiculous oneliners! What is not to love?

2.) Faggy super hero fetish wear anyone?

In case you were not already doing so, I want you to take a good hard look at Chris O’Donnell’s (Robin’s) crotch. Any fag will tell you: that fucker is packing heat. And when it comes to movies, I think crotchy actors is something we can all collectively get behind.

3.) Strong, fashionable, faggette ladies:

Are they queer or just “queer friendly”? Who knows! One thing that is for sure though: these volumized hair having, spandex wearing, ass kicking ladies are a camp lovers wet dream!

In conclusion:

Old Batman is faggy and awesome!

New Batman is boring and hates the gays.

The End.


4 Responses to “Jon: Ok, I’m getting sick of the trash talk….”

  1. 1 thehostess
    July 28, 2008 at 7:27 am

    There will always be room in my heart for Faggy Batman…

  2. 2 Josh
    July 28, 2008 at 10:12 am

    Yes! I completely agree. I used to love those movies when I was a kid. Man, I had biggest seven-year-old homo crush on Robin (re-watching it, I still do). Hell, I even dressed up as Robin for Halloween– by the way, how lame is it that I dressed up as Robin, not Batman?. I did forget (or didn’t realize) how cheesy it was, though; but I’m a huge fan of camp. Why else would I own the Charlie’s Angels movie remake on DVD? Also, Uma Thurman was great as Ivy. Love her!

    People need to lighten up. No matter how you break it down or dress it up in a stupidly hoarse voice, Batman is still a dude in a leather bat suit.

  3. 3 gaycondo
    July 28, 2008 at 6:52 pm

    I have to admit, I had a major crush on the O’Donnell Robin as well, though it was a much more mature 12-year-old one in 1995. It’s an undeniable fact: Robin is a babe!

  4. 4 The Bearded Traveler
    August 1, 2008 at 10:30 am

    I lIKED Batman and Robin! FUNNY Schwarzenneggar! Funny Bain, or Bane, or whatever…
    FUNNY nostalgia about the butler, ALFRED! Robin was all JEALOUS of Batman!!!
    Silly, fun stuff. And how about BURT WARD?? ADAMMM? yep yep

    BUT it’s too bad they have no “LEDGER, H.” in them!!

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