Paul: Naughty Airlines…


… I can’t believe this shit!


Since I seldomly drive and mostly bike, I could really care less about the fact that gas prices are down.  That being said though, I was really surprised that on our recent vacation, Jon and I were not given some sort of consolation from our airline. We bought the tickets  while gas was near $4 a gallon, and considering how the price has dropped about 50% since then you’de think they would try to win back our affections with (at the bare minimum) free peanuts. Instead, for the first time ever, I paid money to check a single bag! WTF!

Perhaps I had high expectations because we flew Ted airlines, the new, supposedly hip spinoff of United. I was expecting a fun party plane, full of cocktails and lavatory blowjobs. It was really just the same old shit minus the first class cabin. I think that if airlines really want to succeed they need to reinvent themselves just like the car companies. I mean, one company decides no more peanuts and they all immediately follow suit. They’re like, “Thank god someone else did it first, those peanuts were killing our profits!” Give me a break! How about an airline for adults only??? I don’t see why you should have to pay twice as much for first class to get an open bar. I really thought Ted would be different, sadly we were disappointed.

On a related note, check out this nasty commercial for Braniff Airlines from the 60’s… The Air “Strip”…

BTW.. According to my friend Jonathan, Frontier has gloryholes.


2 Responses to “Paul: Naughty Airlines…”

  1. 1 The Bearded Traveler
    December 10, 2008 at 1:23 am

    You’ve seen the Warhol Braniff commercial too?

    Airlines are in a bit of a bind, in that it simply costs a lotta money to fly jets,
    I guess… but they sure give you nothing at all, no help, no service, no benefits.
    None of the LITTLE things that could go a long way.

  2. December 11, 2008 at 11:12 am

    Interestingly, that Braniff uniform was famously designed by Emilio Pucci.
    Also, I heard awhile ago that they stopped serving peanuts because of allergies being so common, but usually they at least give you a snack mix!

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